The Decision to Sleep Train
Sleep deprivation is to be expected as a new parent. Those first few months of life are amazingly precious but also incredibly challenging, too. A blur of frequent night wakings and long, dizzying days with squishy newborns make up most of our recollection. As mothers, we carry out extreme exhaustion with unconditional love because we know the goal is to get our babies to thrive and meet a certain goal weight.
But what happens when they do and the frequent wakings persist? Worsen even?
Like countless other mamas, this happened to me right around 4 months- with twins. Once the dust of newborn adrenaline settled and our nights were only more intense, things became almost unmanageable.
The thought of sleep training crossed my mind several times but I was reluctant to swallow my pride and seek support; adamant to see things through my way. I convinced myself that my babies needed to feed every few hours until one fateful day when I finally had enough. Hiring a sleep consultant is a very personal decision, and often times a program that isn’t understood properly so I wanted to share my experience for any parents in a similar boat.
I decided to contact Kelsey from West Coast Sleep Consulting when I finally hit my rock bottom. I felt numb in an unhealthy delirium of daily sleep deprivation, unable to enjoy my life with the babies. I knew my mental health was dwindling and that I needed to take action before that became a bigger issue. I wanted to be present for my children.
Kelsey was so incredible to speak with on the phone for our consultation and made me feel completely at ease as I poured my heart out to her. I explained what was going on for naps, feeds and bedtime, and Kelsey was able to quickly point out where a lot of the key drivers to our wakings were. My routine habits for survival with twins were consequentially becoming mechanisms to keep them needing my frequent intervention.
Having a sleep consultant holds you accountable for success, similar to a physical trainer. Kelsey was able to assess Mila and Liam, customize a plan for me based on their individual needs, oversee their sleep/feed logs and then make daily recommendations. The support was outstanding. Night one will likely be the most challenging part of the two-week program, but once you get through that the results of training begin to transpire.
After the first week of sticking to it, I was in disbelief that my twins who used to wake every 1-2 hours the whole night through were now sleeping from 7pm-7am with only 1 waking to feed. A good majority of parents see their babes sleeping through after night 3, but I was completely satisfied with our one-feed transition. What I love most about West Coast Sleep Consulting is that you are able to comfort, connect and support your baby as needed through the night. It is a lot less scary or upsetting than you might originally suspect.
What’s interesting to note is that I worked our program exactly the same for both babies, and yet we saw variances in results. Mila is definitely our better sleeper- she can now make it the whole night through without a feed- but Liam still has his challenges. He had recently been going through his six-month regression, and it kept us on our toes to not let up all that we had learned in the program. There were nights that I caved for the “quick fix” again with him because he struggled more. The best thing to do in this case is not beat yourself up, start over again when ready to apply the principles of the program and get back into the swing of things in no time.
We managed to get through both the 6-month regression and frequent teething spells over the past month with only minor variances in wakings for Liam. Having twins provided good insight that every baby is uniquely different, but if you stick to the knowledge of this program, the nights are manageable and resolve in good time.
When it comes to sleep, I certainly wasn’t seeking perfection, but I absolutely needed improvement. I have been so much happier and healthier since we completed the program. I would highly recommend giving yourself the gift of sleep if your baby has met his or her goal weight and you are struggling. Even if you aren’t struggling but want to get an early handle on sleep skills as parents, I couldn’t advocate West Coast Sleep consulting more.
As an added bonus, Kelsey is a registered social worker and has a registered clinical counsellor on her team, so both can be claimed if you have benefits!
To get started, send Kelsey an email at [email protected]
Love always,
Momma Mills XO
Photography by Tails And Wings
